He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize