week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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