am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
