Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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