perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother