She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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