I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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