I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
