went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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