why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
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