I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I need a burrito and a hug.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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