what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
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I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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