Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
So many bounce houses so little time
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
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