but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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