Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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