can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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