It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Randomize
