i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
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