This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch