she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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