is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
