Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Hippo gnu deer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize