covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize