I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
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They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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