You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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