talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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