It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
