you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I deserve this hangover.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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