I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
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