I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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