i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
