My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
