i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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