Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
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