who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
