why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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