When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize