Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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