look no pants
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
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I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
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Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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