do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize