Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
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