She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize