How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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