so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
