3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
