fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
