It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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