Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
