at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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