oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
